Saturday, December 31, 2011

सारा लाल?

SARA LEAL?

Will Sara Leal make a cameo appearance on TWO AND A HALF MEN?

Friday, December 30, 2011

क?

Hey, Conspiracy Nuts! Ready for another fun end of year special? I bet you are! Well, jsut to let you know...Belgian troops will..WILL BE stationed in Northern New Jersey to train for upcoming multi-national military exercises!

Hey, Rio Grande Valley! Don't feel left out either! Chinese troops will be in our area to assess threat levels and learn the latest in crowd control!

It's all good!
GO GLOBAL!
Contact: flacofone@hushmail.com

EUNICE

EUNICE seeks a job as a graphics artist!
Contact her at: sonton1@lycos.com

JACKRABBITS

McAllen still has some empty fields. Just look around. WE are not saying that you can spot a ranch 5 minutes away from 10th Street. The heart of cruising does not have to worry about the smell of bovine nastiness!

WE know of a place nearby where one can spot a jack rabbit now and then as it zigs and zags! Especially if YOU surprise it!

WE have even seen a coyote emerge from the fog as it crosses Nolana!

NICE.

स्विस TEA

SWISS TEA

WE popped into the local Walgreens for a cold drink! WE were there to also pick up some Walgreens soap. It seems that they have done away with their jabon!

SWISS TEA based out of Dallas. Nice Southern Style tea. Not too sweet for US!

Just a small treat for US yesterday as WE wade through end of month and end of year tasks!

www.swiss-tea.com

Thursday, December 29, 2011

अज़ीज़ हस हनी हज़ेल्नुत काप्पुचिनो!

AZIZ HAS HONEY HAZELNUT CAPPUCHINO!

48 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT this morning and WE stop at an Aziz convinience store at Nolana and Jackson on the Mcallen/Pharr border for a warm beverage!

WE spot the cappuchino section and zoom in and notice a new flavor! HONEY HAZELNUT!

WE grab some Encanto Japanese peanuts and then sip the cap!

WE loved it!

CHECK IT OUT!
AZIZ CARRIES RC COLA!
KEEP ROCKING IT AZIZ!

बिल महर एंड GOD

Bill Maher teased Tim Tebow for the loss to the Buffalo Bills. He did it on Twitter. The atheist big mouth really stepped on his own poop! Now folks are calling for a boycott of his HBO program!

TEBOW is a classy quarterback. He had no comment!

GOD? GOD HAD NO COMMENT EITHER!

GOD CREATED BILL MAHER. Mr. Bill Maher has free will and won't believe in the All Mighty...although as long as he breathes one never knows!

There is hope for every living soul on this lovely planet....even for bill maher!

He will have to live with the fact that GOD created him!

(bill bud maher was not made in Japan)

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

KARDIE: FISHING GUIDE

KARDIE SEEKS A JOB AS A FISHING GUIDE!
Contact: chambaking@live.com

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

RTV

RTV is a lot of fun! Travelling back into the 1980's with "Highway To Heaven" and then cruising in the 1960's with "Route 61".

Not a bad alternative to today's TV landscape.

WE only wish RTV would broadcast the ORIGINAL HAWAII 5-0!
JACK LORD!!!!

Monday, December 26, 2011

डल्लास एंड न्यू योर्क SHOWDOWN

COWBOYS TO TWO-STEP WITH GIANTS FOR ALL THE DIVISIONAL MARBLES SUNDAY!

Dallas managed to gift-wrap a Christmas gift for the Philadelphia Eagles on Christmas Eve as they lost to their hated divisional foe 20 to 7.

Tony Romo went out of the game with a banged up right hand.

WE fear they took the approach that it did not matter if they won or lost! It's the NFL...not fake wrestling! *NOTE: There IS a difference between fake wrestling and the WWE WRESTLING! ONE is fake and the other is PROFESSIONALLY REAL!!!* SERIOUSLY!!

WE thought it was W-L-T (Win Loss Tie) not W-L-T-DHTW Win Loss Tie Don't Have To Win!!

Would they ever apply that to high school football? WE hope not!

SO now the Pokes take on the Giants this coming Sunday for the NFC East Divisional Title! Will Romo be ready to go? Will Dallas flop it...AGAIN?

GO COWBOYS!
WIN-LOSE-TIE

Saturday, December 24, 2011

CHRISTMAS IN IRAN

Hide your Bibles
live your faith.
Bury secrets in the sand.
Never give into the darkness.
Never wager on your sweet soul.
Never let the devil take you to his throne room!
Tehran streets are corridors
into the souls of men...
you know where you walk
you know every step
by the candle light
read the Good Book.
Genesis makes you smile.
Revelations makes you weep with joy.
ACTS gives you wisdom and strength.
All along you fight the true infidels!
JESUS walks the roads and streets of Persia.
unafraid.

EGG NOG BLUES

I saw the egg nog as early as the week before Thanksgiving! It was at a Stripes store or an Aziz. Memory betrays me at this point. All I remember is that I WANTED SOME! I told myself that I would purchase a bottle later. Echoes of that phrase rang in my ear until today...CHRISTMAS EVE!

I will make my way in the drizzy to get a Borden's Egg Nog botella soon. It is still dark outside the office. 6:47 am, drizzly and cold.

I love egg nog. I just don't want to aggravate the nasty cold I have!

I could drink the stuff year-round. Hmmmmm......

Thursday, December 22, 2011

टाइम अस GIFT

FOR CHRISTMAS ALL I WANT IS FOR MY 3 YOUNGEST SIBLINGS TO VISIT MY ELDERLY PARENTS
ONCE A WEEK FOR AT LEAST ONE HOUR!

-KIMMY

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

WHEN IS A PENNY WORTH MORE THAN ONE CENT?

NICE QUESTION: When is a penny worth more than one cent?

ANSWER: WHEN WE "hide" a penny somewhere in the USA!

If you can guess where our penny is hidden you win $1.00!
If no one finds it it goes up 1 buck the next week!

So take a guess!

TODAY'S PENNY CITY IS SEATTLE, WASHINGTON!
Give us the exact address and double your dollar!
Give us the spot and win a buck!

IF YOU SEE SOMEONE IN AN RGVPOST.COM SHIRT THEY WILL GIVE YOU THE ANSWER!

GOOD LUCK

YOGA!

2011 is on its way out! It is slowly packing up its bags and mapping out a trail into the PAST. What lies in the future? WE do not know. We have no crystal ball.

That is what makes life interesting.

WE will God-willing get into yoga in 2012!

How many yoga places in the Rio Grande Valley?

Contact our lovely health nut at: vazoyim@mail.com
*Please do not ask Valerie for a picture!

MELLA'S RED CHEVY COBALT!

MELLA!
YOUR RED CHEVY COBALT ROCKS!
SO says Penny!

MELLA'S RED CHEVY COBALT!

MELLA!
YOUR RED CHEVY COBALT ROCKS!
SO says Penny!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

होर्चाता काप्पुचिनोस!

HORCHATA CAPPUCHINOS AT STRIPES STORES!

WE rolled into a Stripes Store this morning for some cookies and a warm beverage!
WE saw something new! Or at least WE had not seen it before!

Horchata Cappuchinos! Wow! If you like the cold ones....chances are you may dig the warm ones!

Give them a try!

Saturday, December 17, 2011

थे कोरडोबा CAFE

THE CORDOBA CAFE

The Cordoba Cafe in McAllen was on our flight plan Friday morning! WE had seen it on OUR radar for quite some time now and were plotting our course slowly!

WE popped in for some excellet cappuchino! WE were immediately made welcome! Always a plus in business! WE purchased some chocolate covered coffee beans and some java to make from Oaxxaca, Mexico!

All in ALL it was a very positive experience and are making it our favorite java joint!

WE have been to some coffee spots where you are profiled. Yeah, the baristas make you feel unwelcome. Especially if you do not dress like a rich java afficionado.
It's like "take your coffee don't come back.

Or how about the java joints that seem so robotic? Nuff said.

AT THE CORDOBA CAFE THE COFFEE WAS NOT THE ONLY THING WARM.

17 DAYS IN BUSINESS AS OF DECEMBER 17, 2011.
WE WISH THEM THE GREATEST SUCCESS!
CHECK THEM OUT!

CORDOBA CAFE
THE SOCIAL CUP
1303 N. 10TH STREET
MCALLEN, TEXAS
(956)781-9338

PS: nice tag: The Social Cup.

THE RECEIPT SAYS "PLEASE VISIT AGAIN"
REST ASSURED...WE WILL!

क्रिसमस चीर?

TOO MUCH COMMERCIAL CHRISTMAS CHEER?

THERE she was in the left turn lane at the entrance to a church on McColl Road with her hazzard light blinking red. The people leaving the church were honking their disapproval at her choice of parking spots!

The adult daycare nurse was running late and her company van had stalled on her right then and there. Drizzle. Cold. Not so nice Christians hellishly honking at her! One man stopped. Perhaps he would help? Nope. He talked to her then made a left turn into an attorney's office. Maybe he wanted to sue her for parking in his way?

Finally a young tall gentleman and one of our staff members helped the lady roll the van into the church parking lot. It was far more secure there! She had notified her employer. Help was on the way. She had been on her way to pick up an elderly woman from a doctor's appointment. Arrangements were made for her retrieval from the physician's office.

Maybe the church folk were trying to help the woman by sonic push? The honking was supposed to move the van out of the way?

Maybe they were too wrapped up in their COMMERCIAL CHRISTMAS SPIRIT?

WHAT WOULD JESUS HAVE DONE? I doubt HE would have cussed her out for satanically getting in HIS flock's way! I seriously doubt that!



SHAME ON YOU CHURCHIES! HOW UN-CHRISTMAS AND UNCHRISTIAN OF YOU!

Count US at rgvpost.com out of attending your Christmas celebration!

KUDOS TO THE STRANGER THAT HELPED OUR STAFF MEMBER in coming to the aid of this poor woman and her van!

Friday, December 16, 2011

मग्नेटिक POINT

MAGNETIC POINT

I don't know what it is about our house that this year 2 nutty couples have parked on our street to argue in the middle of the night! The first was sometime this Summer. They were absolutely drunk and angry.

Last night I woke up at 12:48 AM to catch the tail end of a nasty argument between 2 women and one guy. The man was rather subdued and jerky. Line of the day? "Leave her alone...she's not going anywhere with you!" Actually the line of the day was "I will call the cops on you!" I started to worry that maybe I WOULD have to call 911.

It was over in about 5 minutes. She got in the truck. Off they went southbound and then sped back north.

I had heard 2 crashing beer bottles on the road.

This morning I should be able to find the debris....hopefully not a beaten body.

SO how did this woman meet Prince Charming?

Who knows.

I just hope they don't come back to Magnetic Point to wake me up in the middle of the night!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

थे हरवेल मिद्दले स्कूल शूटिंग INCIDENT

THE HARWELL MIDDLE SCHOOL SHOOTING INCIDENT

Whether it was a "hunting mishap" or "target practicing" does not make much difference. The fact of the matter is that two kids were shot at Harwell Middle School in Edinburg, Texas. Those youngsters could have easily died.

NO ONE SHOULD BE HUNTING OR TARGET PRACTICING NEAR A SCHOOL! NO ONE!

Safety and firearms are mandatory and essential.

If law enforcement does not take action by charging anyone it is up to the parents to SUE! Why not? Their kids could have died! Oh...gee you are just going to let it go as an oops episode. It is not like "oops! I spilled my milk.

No. This was BLOOD. Not milk.

WE believe in the 2nd Amendment. WE also believe in common sense and gun safety.

Any idiot can purchase a firearm as long as he does not have a criminal record.

Do our children have to wear bullet proof vests to school?

PARENTS: SUE THE DAYLIGHTS OUT OF THE RESPONSIBLE INDIVIDUAL. AS PART OF THE SUIT...PERHAPS YOU COULD TAKE THEIR WEAPON.

DON'T JUST OOPS THIS AWAY!

TETHERING

VISIT A CRICKET PHONE STORE AND ASK ABOUT TETHERING!
OR visit them online at: www.mycricket.com

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

यूं हूँ!

KARLIE 59: YOO-HOO!

KARLIE 59 please contact GavilanTony!
Contact: gavilantony@yexmail.com

दाना DELANY

ANOTHER EXCELLENT EPISODE OF "BODY OF PROOF" with the lovely and talented Dana Delany! Huge Fan! Just relaxed and sipped some egg nog! WHEN? LAST NIGHT...TUESDAY 9:00 PM ON A-B-C!

Monday, December 12, 2011

D IS FOR DALLAS

The Dallas Cowboys found a way to lose last night as they tangoed with the New York Giants! The game went back and forth and forth and back.

Just when IT looked like the Pokes were going to send the G-Men back to the Big Apple with their faces in their hands ROMO dropped the hammer before he could nail New York's coffin. That was all Eli Manning needed to bring the Giants back.

YOU never give the Giants any chance...not even a little one!

Come on Cowboys!

SO much for taking control of their division!

Sunday, December 11, 2011

१२ देस ऑफ़ CHRISTMAS

12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS IS WELL-WRITTEN

THE MONITOR does an excellent job with their yearly 12 Days Of Christmas series in which they feature a needy family or person in great need. The community responds in generous fashion by coming to the aid of the folks featured in the stories.

GOD bless them.

Give it a read!

The Monitor is online at: www.themonitor.com and covers what is known as the Rio Grande Valley of South Texas.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

थिंग्स ठाट गो बंग इन IRAN

THINGS THAT GO BANG IN IRAN

Hey
Iran
check your sites.
Let your sentries eat their candies.
Let your soldiers sleep in tonight!
May you find a thousand raindrops in your coffee!
May you see the snow flakes in your minds!
Have a Merry Christmas and eat some sugared tortillas!
Sing Christmas carols
and dance all night!
Watch your back door!
Watch the front!
Check your windows!
Light the brights!
Mossad agents wear bright pink!
CIA spooks wear sweet tights!
It's not just a gas leak
It's not just a freak thing.
Your nukies are vulnerable.
WE might say hi!

हब्द दर्ज!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEE RUN JIGZ!

ऊट्श्रूईङ रगव JOBS

OUTSOURCING RGV JOBS

Oh yeah...IT is coming and faster than YOU think! The outsourcing of Rio Grande Valley Jobs is creepinig up on US!

Are you ready to speak to customer service overseas...for your newspaper delivery for example?

REMEMBER: YOU PROVIDE EXCELLENT SERVICE AND YOU GET EXCELLENT PROFITS.
DO THE OPPOSITE AND YOU GET HORRIBLE PROFITS!

IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!

Friday, December 9, 2011

ERASMO REYES TRUCK FOR HIRE

WE want America working again! Work brings dignity and provides cash for life's true necessities! Food, medicine, clothes, and such. YOU get the picture!

WE do what WE can. Free for all you hard-working souls!

IF YOU NEED A TRUCK FOR HIRE PLEASE CHECK OUT ERASMO REYES!

MR. REYES has a 24 foot truck. He can help you haul material.
A 6 cyclinder vehicle. F-650.
Contact Erasmo at (956)905-4553

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

MOUNTAIN DEW GAME FUEL

MOUNTAIN DEW DOES IT AGAIN!
WE tried the Mountain Dew Game Fuel this past weekend and loved it!

If only they made a 3 liter version!

No sweat.

Great sip!
WE love the line "DEW with a charge of Tropical Flavor"

Killer line!
www.mountaindew.com

COWBOYS VS GIANTS ON SNF

COWBOYS VERSUS GIANTS

Here comes the week-end! Yes, Virginia that means FOOTBALL! WE are talking the Dallas
Cowboys versus the New York Giants! Estamos hablando...en la noche...Sunday Night Football! I wonder if Hank Williams, JR will be checking out the game?

Can the Pokes beat the G-Men?

Sure.

Will they?

WE hope they do!

TOSTITOS!

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

एओक्स प्रूफ्रेअदेर्स WANTED

EOX PROOFREADERS WANTED!
WORK ONLINE PART-TIME!
Do mundane online tasks interest you?
Maybe you could get paid for it!

Contact: chambaking@live.com

नोए TORRES

NOE TORRES AND UFOS

CONGRATULATIONS TO NOE TORRES FOR WRITING BOOKS ON UFOS!
We cannot wait to read "Mexico's Roswell".

Mr. Torres has also been nominated for a 2011 CHONERO AWARD!

FELICIDADES SENOR TORRES!

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

ज़िप्पेर्स ZUCK

ZIPPERS ZUCK!

There I said it! Zippers zuck. Yes, they do suck. I have had a nasty relationship with zippers for the past decade. It is something that really catches my skin.

Ouchless? You would think that zippers are the definition of convinience. I mean who really utilizes buttons? Really?

Nope. Two of the two jackets I am using today have zippers and both have done a great job of giving me the Judas Treatment. My third warm-up is a PULL-OVER! A Mexican hoodie that is quite fine at keeping me warm!

Zippers? Zip IT! They are not to be trusted...at least not by Me, Myself, and I!

Sunday, December 4, 2011

मोबाइल मेचानिक?

MOBILE MECHANIC?

WE were taking a break at our headquarters yesterday. Just checking our garden when WE noticed a big black truck pass by. At first WE thought maybe it was a Flexi Compras or Aarons truck.

It seemed to be a mobile mechanic! Black truck! WE did not catch the number on the vehicle! Argh!

Does anyone know anything about a mobile mechanic?

Contact our grouchy reviewer at: catarinocat@hotmail.com

कातारिनो वेल्स थे MONITOR

IS THE MONITOR FOR SALE?

The good old Monitor has been OUR favorite local newspaper for quite sometime. The Monoply I mean The Monitor has been through a rough patch. That is putting it mildly!

Circulation numbers have been dismal.

It appears that it is for sale. Any takers?

A word of advice to any potential buyers: Totally restructure the company soul. Pop up a tent next door on that empty field and bring in the flock if you do not kick them all to the curb and bring in newbies.

The lax liberal-loco-librarian-Libertarian mindset is way too weird.

How about company uniforms?

How about signs within the edifice directing to the proper departments? Do you as a
customer want to roam the place looking for Editorial...Customer Service or Classifieds? Come on!

If The Monitor is to survive it must not fear innovation and a retooling of its soul!

POOR SERVICE TRANSLATES INTO POOR PROFITS!

Agree?
Contact: catarinocat@hotmail.com

डाली'स COFFEEHOUSE

DALI COFFEE HOUSE

WE had been anticipating the opening of Dali Coffeehouse like hyperactive kids! WE finally made our way to it about 2 weeks ago! WE like that it is close to our headquarters and office!

WE like the ambiance and feel WE will make a return trip! Check them out!
DALI COFFEEHOUSE
3700 W. DOVE
MCALLEN, TEXAS
(956)6828878
WARNING: DO NOT PROCEED WEST to exit the coffeehouse...deadend ahead!

हेब ROCKS

HEB ROCKS!

HEB! WE LOVE HEB! ALL WE HAVE KNOWN FROM DAY ONE IS HEB SUPERMARKETS! Sure, I was born in West Texas and lived up there from age 1 to 2. DO I really remember the name of the supermarket up in Fisher County? Let me think about it a bit....no, I do not!

SO YOU ROCK HEB!